Heart Healing

This past week my heart has been heavy.

Another school shooting.

Another time of mourning.

Another opportunity for both sides to place blame,

point the finger,

and shout their propaganda.

I have watched the responses of people around the country.

Those who propose more gun control.

Those who propose more counseling.

Those who protest,

who yell the loudest that their solution will work,

who are honestly, truly grieving in the only way they know.

I have been sad.

I have been discouraged,

and I have cried…for those families, for America, and for my own family.

And yet, after the tears, when the impossibility of it all seemed too great, I heard this question:

DO YOU BELIEVE?

Over the years I have prayed, “Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief” more times than I can count.

The fact is, I do believe.

I believe in God, creator of heaven and earth.

I believe in Jesus, who rose again.

I believe in the Holy Spirit who intercedes for me when I have no words.

I believe that in this world we will have trouble, but that Christ has overcome the world.

And then, impossibly, I have peace. The peace that truly passes understanding.

Then I look again.

I see my husband. Up every day to support these soldiers and their families.

I see my children. Far from perfect but learning and growing.

I see my friends. Some with loud voices and some with soft, but so many to remind me that I am not alone in my faith.

I see my country. Allowing all voices to be heard. Struggling, but still here.

And I pray. I pray for God to move as only He can. I pray for peace for hurting hearts. I pray for our children to grow in safety and learning right from wrong. I pray for God to work change in people’s hearts and for that change to spread to all aspects of our society. But mostly I pray:

Come quickly, Lord Jesus.